Most of us have to deal with a stubborn and egoistic partner in life. They try to suppress us, atleast that is how we feel, they make you feel suffocated, and all you can think of is running away. However, that is an escapist's attitude. There is a way to deal with all kinds of people and "iska bhi todh hai"! There is always a solution to everything. Don't feel smothered because we at HerZindagi will not let you! We have come up with ways that might just help you out in this sticky situation.
Let's first start with the fact that you need to embed in your head and that is -- Egoists are not bad people, they are just faulty. The problem here is, that they think that everything they do or say is right. It is a waste of time if you plan on getting them to accept their mistake. Now that we have given the "disclaimer" let's get on with what we truly need to do for the peace of our mind.
Talk To Him Frankly
If you feel that he is dominating you and is suffocating you, communicate it to him. However, be patient. He will not be able to change overnight.
Learn And Practice Saying The Word NO!
If he is being to intervening and interfering with your personal wishes and desires, you have to gather the courage to be able to say no. The more you practice it, the more your confidence will build.
Just because you are with an egoist, doesn’t mean you should stay quiet and let him have his way. Voice your opinions in a calm manner. Let them know your point of view but don’t try to force it on them. If you tell an egoist to do something in a certain way, they’ll make sure to do it in some other way. Don’t force your opinion on him and let him do things in his own way after having voiced your opinion once. If his way doesn’t work out, you can calmly remind him that you told him so.
Don't Expect An Apology
Getting angry at bad behaviour is okay, but don’t expect a big apology from the egoist. He might quiet down if you are angry but will continue to believe that he didn’t do anything wrong. If you force him to apologise he will hate you for it.
You Do Not Need His Permission
Quit asking for permission for doing things. He is not your parent! Become a little more independent as well... that helps with the confidence that you feel is lost because of what has been happening. That confidence gives you courage!
Encourage When He Shows Good Behaviour
Don't tolerate bad behaviour but then at the same time, encourage good behaviour. No matter how egoist a person is, they still do manage to do good things. When this happens make sure to praise your stubborn partner and let him know that you appreciate his good behaviour. Egoists are always looking for praises and if you condition them by giving it only when they behave well, things will get a lot easier for you.
But, DO NOT FLATTER. Don't go overboard with the praising also. They will get too used to your flattery and expect it all the time. They’ll expect you to always flatter them and stay submissive to them. This is not what you want. At All!
Stay tuned to HerZindagi for more on relationships.