The google dictionary defines consent as “to agree to something or allow something to happen” And there you go, it must be all clear and sorted after this definition but it is not, not in our society. Consent is a widely misunderstood concept as people try to read between the lines, and do what they are willing to hear, believing that the other person is signaling them and telling them indirectly that it is a yes. And this happens most of the time in matters of sexual consent.
Sexual consent is very important at every given moment and every stage of life. It is also vital for us to understand and promulgate the fact that “No means No” without a doubt. Following are some connotations of consent that are wrong and must be discontinued.
Considering Flirting Or Kissing As Consent
Misjudging consent can lead to severe fallouts, rapes, and other such heinous sexual crimes happen when one disregards consent. Our society is full of cases where the men who do such things complain and blame the entire situation on the girl by citing that she flirted with him or kissed him.
But breaking it down, what we get is that flirting and even kissing or hugging someone is not consent and hence it must not be considered so. Flirting just means that the person is interested in having a romantic conversation with you and similarly kissing means that the person is genuinely inclined and has feelings for you. But this, in any case, does not give one permission to have sex.
Wearing Certain Clothes Is Not Consent
Again, a girl wearing something short or tight or revealing or how so ever she dresses is not linked to her consent. Thinking that if a girl is wearing revealing clothes then she might be saying a yes for sex also is totally a morally wrong concept and hence one must not think like that.
Past Consent Does Not Mean A Yes
People come close together and sometimes they fall apart. In such terms, you must be careful of forming bonds and asking for consent at the very moment. Considering past consent as a way to take advantage of someone is wrong and it must be understood that past consent is not valid forever.
Maybe Or No Answer At All Is Not Consent
We are living in very hard times, so much so that sometimes we are not able to comprehend what is actually going on inside our minds and are confused about things, giving to which we might say “Maybe” or nothing at all to our partner asking for our consent. It must be noted that silence or maybe is not mean rightful consent.
Even if that person is saying a yes, it might not necessarily mean that the girl understands the situation well and is ready to be a part of the act. That is why consent from a minor stands void.
Forced Yes Or Something Said In A State Of Intoxication Is Not Consent
Forcing someone to say yes to sexual activity is not right and even if the person is saying yes, she might not be willing to do it. So, in case you sense any hesitation from your partner's end, stop and ask again. Also, something said in a state of intoxication must not be considered to be the way to go as the person is not in the right state of mind to be able to make proper decisions.
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What Is Consent Then?
Consent is simply when a person who is fully aware and conscious is willing to say a yes with conviction, then it is a yes. Only yes means yes, when said with complete confidence and faith.
We asked a few people about their views on consent and here’s what they said: “Consent is surely important, forcing things or doing them without the will of your partner even if you are married and close, is wrong. Respecting your partner’s consent all the time is what makes your relationship stronger and helps it grow.” said Anshuman.
“Every girl has the right to stand for herself and she must if her consent is not respected.“, said Meenakshi.
Therefore, we must all uphold our morals and do what is right. Consent is very vital for a healthy relationship be it any kind, going ahead and trying to propose a false connotation of consent is wrong and hence must not be carried forward.
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